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Every morning I wake up with a head full of things to do. I scramble around trying to put them in lists of importance all while trying to keep the peace within my little brood (trying to recall everything I've learned and read about parenting at the same time.) I love being a wife and the quirks that come with having my man forever. I love to be creative and thrive on crossing off my to do list. I strive to find balance and put first things first which brings me PEACE & JOY and allows me to sleep so much easier when I do. I think that one of the secrets to being HAPPY in life is to find that balance. I'm learning how to be kinder to myself and learning patience in progress. Everyday, through the thick and thin of life I'm trying to turn my heart towards heaven and remember what's really important.Oh, and I love to eat, so much so that I love to exercise too.

1.13.2011

Childhood


I'm just wondering what my kids will remember.
My childhood memories are mixed with emotions that make a difference today.
I came home from mutual last night and my girls got out of bed to greet me.
 I very rudely and abruptly told them to get back in bed.
I told them I'd be up to tuck them in in a few minutes.
I felt wet cheeks when I kissed Whit.
me:"Are you crying?"
Abby: "Mom, "You hurt Whitney's feelings."
I felt like a big jerk.
I pictured my own little self, running to greet my mommy.
How would I feel?
Me: "I'm soooo sorry, I wan't being very nice."
I covered her face with lots and lots of kisses.
 me:"Will you forgive me?"

I've never forgotten my little girl feelings.
I've never forgotten...
how it feels to snuggle with mommy in her bed.
  how it feels to be misunderstood.
 the "I'm sorrys" that were never said.
the "I'm sorrys" that were said.
the life talks with my mom.
the doll clothes she spent hours on.

I'm sad that sometimes I can't remember as many happy moments as I want to.
I tend to dwell and stew over unfavorable moments.
Its simply not good. 
I've drowned out happy memories by focusing on unforgotten hurts.
There's wisdom in forgiving. 

Childhood hurts,
childhood joys.
 Remembered.
Forgotten.
Feel again.
When my little girl cries.
Love.
Regret.


2011 goal: Organize pictures.  Any tips?



Mom loved to watch me sleep.




Loved that bikini.



We were fort builders.

I see myself.



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3 comments:

  1. Shelli1/13/2011 9:46 PM

    Thoughtful post Kimmi. We all do this, but the good thing is you apologized. They will remember that. Why is it easier for us to focus on the negative? Life is a learning journey, isn't it? You are doing awesome!

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  2. almond nuthouse1/16/2011 9:07 PM

    This is the first time I have read your blog, but so many of the things you said in this post were exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for helping me realize some things I needed to realize and thing about. Rachel

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  3. Kim1/17/2011 6:52 AM

    Hi Rachel!! Sounds like we may have somethings in common. I've been wanting to get to know you better. I was very excited when you got called into YW. I'll talk to you soon. :)

    ReplyDelete

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