How I love before and afters and great finds!!!

Living on one income with four kids.

I don't get to buy straight out of Pottery Barn Magazine.
Someday, I might.
But, oh, the inspiration I find in magazines, on the web, in other's homes.

Jeff's dream was to have a garage without a bunch of clutter.
So, I went to work the last couple weeks to rid one of the walls of my projects.

Here's some BEFORE AND AFTER love.

BEFORE

$8.00 @ a yard sale



AFTER


BEFORE
Bought this with a hutch top at a yard sale for $30
Painted it white.
Moved to new house and wanted to change things up a bit.
Put the hutch top, which wasn't attached up in my craftroom.


AFTER
Sofa table.




GREAT FINDS


When I found this beaded mirror I knew if would be perfect. It had lots of hangy things on it that made it look old. I cut them off and then brought the mirror in to my front room to see how it could fit in with what I already have. I found the clock for $.50.


When I saw this circle hangy thing I snatched it right away. $2. I pictured it on the wall or as part of a table setting. My friend Linda was over for my birthday and I showed it to her. She told me it was for hanging stockings. Not a my house!!
The lamp and shade I bought last weekend at yard sales.
The lamp-$2
The shade- wait for it.......




$1!!!!

10 years ago I didn't think yard sales and thrift stores were for me, but time and time again, I find that somebody else's junk is almost always my treasure.
Especially with imagination and some spray paint!!!!!


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My style inspirations

I've been collecting images in a folder on my desktop.
Decor that inspires me.
When I'm out thrift shopping, maybe I'll find something that I can use to create what I love.
I don't know who to give credit for these photos. I guess I should start keeping track.














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Be still my heart.

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My Summer Plan...

...was going strong for a good week, then the kids rotated to different jobs, I got busy doing a little painting, and we got off track. My "plan" was a little to complicated.
Time for a revamp.
I'm finding that my job charts and rewards were difficult to follow and be consistent with. So, for all of you that have been waiting for the perfect chore chart, and summer plan, you'll have to look elsewhere. I so wish I could say that my plan will live on from this summer and beyond. Ha!!


Last year a lady in our ward who has 15 kids (the mother of this gal), gave a talk on Mother's Day. The thing that I'm remembering the most about that talk is that she said something about how many different chore charts she's made. I believe I'm getting a glimpse of what she's talking about. It's an art to figure this stuff out!!
Here's a sampling of what I came up with.

Weekly Job Chart1


Summer Responsiblities1
The charts are laminated for easy dry erase marker use.

They also have magnets on the back.

There are 3 types of jobs that the kids are doing.
Personal- they earn computer cash and cotton balls in the daily fun jar
Family
Above and beyond their responsibility for extra cash

I don't want them to get paid for taking care of their own personal space but I do want them to earn $$$ so they can learn how to save and manage it when mistakes have smaller repercussions.

I want the PERFECT PLAN. Yeah right?
Ummmm. Is there one. I might be willing to pay.

I did find this chart from my friend Allison's blog. Simple, but complex.

I think I'd like to see all the chore charts ever made!!! Wouldn't that be amazing?
Is there a perfect plan for making our kids responsible, loving, hard-working, imaginative people?
Maybe. Maybe not.
I think my kids just need some more laughter, some goofiness, and time. I don't have to come up with a whole lot of fancy stuff. They just love being with me, when I'm chilled and not fretting about so much.
Anyway, this is a good idea, I must say. Came up with it myself.

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Preparing for weeping & wailing

I will be introducing the…

Summer

Notebook

Full of

-household chore charts

-computer cash

-prizes to be won

-places to go

-individual goals

-family goals

-brain time activities

The kids are asleep, I'm still preparing.

They won't like all my ideas.

I don't blame them.

But they won't be board and they won't be learning how to waste time.

There will be fun times.

I'll try not to act like an army drill sergeant.

Wish me Luck!

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This week, motherhood is sweet.

Its amazing what I can accomplish when I focus.
Especially when I focus on Christ, my spiritual strength, my marriage, my kids.
My mind is flooded with ideas, ways to correct, inspiration.
I feel so much better than I did last week.
My kids are responding to a much happier mom.


I was in my room on my knees this morning. I heard little feet.
I didn't know who it was until her little voice said "Mom".
I looked up from my prayer and told her simply and sweetly, "I'm talking to Heavenly Father, can you hold on a sec."
She's almost always the first one into my room begging for breakfast.
That's what I was expecting to hear about when I finished.
And then, words that melt my heart.
"Mom, what can I do for you"?
Ethan begged me to take him shopping last night.
He discovered that his piggy bank was loaded with enough $$$ to buy himself a Bakugan.
The house was a bit disorderly (big fat pig pen mess!)
He saw my stress, knew that if he "scratched my back, I'd scratch his."
That boy put his whole heart into serving me last night, even when I released him from any duty he continued to help.
He gave me a big fat hug, told me he wanted to keep helping.
Told me he loved me very much.
It made me cry.
I want more.


Sunday, an idea.
A Peacemaker Party 6:00
All Peacemakers were invited to attend.
Worked like a charm!
Caramel Popcorn Planning Summer Fun
Crazy Uno Game- kids had to say something nice every time they played a card.

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Turn Back Tuesday

December '08
In shape.
Jeans fit great.
Triceps were tight.
Hair was longer.

April '09
Broke my collar bone.


June '09
Want the December Kim back.
Working on it.

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ZUMBA

Trying this tomorrow. I can't WAIT!!!



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Thrift Store Find

Love this pretty white thing.
Catches little clutter.
Looks great up-top my dresser.

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Tools- for life

This last weekend, Jeff was under the house in the crawl, and up in the attic. Working on a phone jack so I can move my computer into the other room. He's good to have around. He's got skills. All kinds. One of the many things I love about him.
He got our boys involved. They were fishing wires, and using all kinds of tools.
Later, after the job was all done, the kids were squabbling, and I got to thinking. Thinking about how the boys will know how to use the TOOLS they used on the job.
Thinking that without the right TOOLS the job could not be done right.
Thinking that living with 5 other human beings-all different, all concerned about their own needs, takes SKILL and TOOLS.
TOOLS to deal with contention, TOOLS to deal with hurt, TOOLS to deal with anger with frustration.
RESPECT.......... LOVE..........FORGIVENESS............SERVICE.............BEING GRATEFUL
I didn't learn these TOOLS very well while I was a kid.
Trying to teach my kids these TOOLS out of a hat.
It get's tricky.
How do we learn to deal with life?
At home.
Humbling for me.
Makes me want to get on my knees more and more so I can teach my kids how to thrive in their adult relationships or even their adolescent ones. (those are the ones I'm most worried about the most)

Side note:
I'm reading Shawni (Eyre) Pothier's book. Found her blog. She did something so BRILLIANT this weekend. I'm thinking there's a sizable mountain in my neighborhood that Devon, Jeff and I will be hiking in a couple of years.

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What do YOU do?

When its time for family prayer, my kids take forever to get on their knees and get reverent. It seems like 9 times out of 10 my husband and I are hollering and nagging them to
GET UP!!
BE QUIET!!
KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF!!!
______, GET OVER HERE AND GET IN THIS CIRCLE...NOW!!!
...and its not like we don't do it enough. We're consistent. I thought they'd have it down by now.
Last night before we left for the temple we had family prayer and it all went down the same way.
I don't feel the Spirit.
I'm mad.


On the way to the temple I told Jeff I don't want there to be so much contention during Family Prayer. I prayed about it while I was in the temple. The thought to put these questions on my blog came to my mind.

What can we do to make family prayer happier?
Is it even possible with young children?
WHAT DO YOU DO?
IS IT THE SAME AT YOUR HOUSE?
I want them to be respectful, reverent, and do it the right way but at what expense?

Should I let them do what they want so there isn't a fight?

Do other families kneel in family prayer and have a mother that's about ready to lose it when it's all done?


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Good Reads

On my side of the bed sits a conglomeration of books and magazines.

I love to read, especially when I need perspective.

This morning I looked for motherhood inspiration in D&C 88, specifically in the versus that talk about order. “Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house...
I started with this verse but then looked over section 88 in its entirety. This section is chalked full of admissions and promises. Reading through it was so instructive, especially with an open heart.

After that I opened up this book.

If anyone needs a breakthrough, its me. This book is awesome and reading it made me realize I'm not actually doing all that bad. I'm actually excited to start "The Plan" and I'm NOT scared about the moaning, whining, and gnashing of teeth.

I have a plan!!! Bring it on!! Summer here I come. (Hopefully I don't crash and burn)

Dissecting my feelings

Still doing better.

Walked outside this morning to look for the bus while the boys shoveled their cereal. (We all woke up kind of late this morning.)

The air smelled like I always remember it smelling when the school year is drawing to an end.

SUMMER

The kids are doing fun activities at school. I always loved Field Day- eating outside and throwing a softball the farthest. I had a really good arm.

Today-
I'm working on planting some flowers, having a picnic with the girls, and doing bills while listening to a parenting CD.

Tonight-
Eat dinner outside- maybe with some soft music and candles. I'm usually not too frilly with my family dinner time but I feel like doing something different tonight.

I'd like to read my book again, but out on the back porch. I walked out there last night after the kids were all in bed and I was heading to my bed, it looked so inviting. Just sit on my rocker and CHILL, REFLECT, and PAT MYSELF ON THE BACK.

This week-
Planning Summer.
Dissecting my feelings. Finding out that I'm willing to spend time on things I can control. I also hate to fail. Somehow its programed in my head that I can't.
So combine these feelings with Motherhood and guess what? It equals disaster on my heart. No wonder I want to work on things that I'm good at and spend time on everything else.

If you asked me to go play a game of tennis I would decline. I have NO idea how to play it. The only thing I know about tennis is something about LOVE? That's it.

If you ask me how to Parent. Yikes. I've read so many books, but in the thick of it, I react and rely on my emotions to dictate action.
Motherhood can not be calculated or controlled because every minute of every day is different. Most of time I wish I had a Linda Eyre at my house coaching me!!! Guess what though? I do have coach. I have the Spirit. Right? And if I cultivate that Spirit in my life I'll be more successful. And Prayer is a direct line to the ultimate coach.
(Do I have that faith? Is that why I've been so sporadic with my spiritual care since I held my first baby in my arms.?)
I'll admit- I am not consistent in this area of my life. I try for a couple of weeks and then I fizzle. Yet, I always expect that I should be able to run my life better than I do. That's like running my car on empty. Doesn't work.

I cannot control my kids. But if I do what I can to have that Spirit and do my best to be as Christlike as I can then eventually there will be a difference. If not now, later. When they're grown they will remember what it was like to mothered by me. Just like I remember my mom.

So, an experiment. (on his word)

Strive for the spirit EVERY day this summer. I'll have every one of my kids with me most of the time. More than ever I need those whispers- do this, do that.
Mother them, try more, don't worry about failing, don't think that my efforts are a waste of my time, teach them to work and serve. REFOCUS.

I can make my home beautiful this summer- painting, decorating.

OR

I can make my family beautiful. Its my choice.
I know I have more control with my home- but I'm not that business. My first priority is my family.

Everyone says they grow up fast. Maybe I should start to listen to that. Soon enough Abby will be in school and then I know me. The feelings of regret will settle in my heart.
I hate regret.
Its damning.
I hate shoulda's and coulda's.

I can't be afraid to fail motherhood.
If I spent more of my time and energy on how to deal with some of our family issues as much as I spend time on- paint colors, Blogging, my makeup, Facebook; I'll probably get better at it.

I'll feel more at peace when I hit my pillow at night.

I'll cut myself some slack, but I KNOW me, and I know what I think about most of my day.
That's why I've been so grumpy. The best part of me is saying, "Kim! Wake up!! Remember what is most important. Remember how you felt when your mom died. Remember that your relationship with your Savior, your husband and with your kids is most important. Do that first and every thing will be fine." DO THAT FIRST.

A couple more thoughts and then I've got to go wrestle with my girls.

My mom gave me a book- All the Time You Need: Mary Ellen Edmunds. I found it the other day. In the inside cover it says,
" Dearest Kim,
You are a wonderful mother to four beautiful children and I'm so very happy that you chose to be a mom in every sense of the word. I'm sure your Heavenly Parents are also pleased. Hang in there! Your childrens' lives will be your reward.
Love you much,
Mom"

And then inside the book something that pierced me.
Mary Ellens says,

"What are the things in your life to which you are intensely devoted and dedicated? What are the things you spend your time on- not just the amount of time, but your BEST time? Your children? The scriptures? Pondering? Exercising? Eating? A book club? Visiting? Attending the temple? Reading?

Lets say you had to drop four things from your life to free up some time. What would you drop? And how would you decide? For what would you drop everything? Your answers would reveal much about your priorities."

If I sat down and answered those questions honestly I would see that there was a need for improvement.


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Figuring it out.

Feeling better.
Perspective is back.
Giving myself a much needed pat on the back.
Counting my blessings.
Laid on the grass with my family last night.
Listened to advice from hubby.
Remembering and having faith that putting first things first makes plenty of room for all else.
Reading this:
I said my prayers this morning and decided to open up my new book and continue reading where I left off. The section I was in- Look for Light in the Trenches. The chapters I read-
Moments--------The Balancing Act----------Enough is Enough-----Prayer Works-----------
Everything I needed to remember (I don't think it was coincidence)
In the chapter- Prayer Works. Tears came easily and I recognized one of my biggest problems when I read this:

"Suppose the Savior comes to visit you. You've rushed around and vacuumed the guest room, put the best sheets on the bed, even got some tulips in a vase on the dresser. Jesus looks around the room, then says, "Oh, thank you for inviting me into your home. Please tell me about your life. "You say, 'I will in just a minute, but something's boiling over on the stove, and I need to let the cat out.'
"Jesus say, 'I know a lot about cats and stoves. I'll come with you.'
"Oh, no,' you say." 'I couldn't let you do that.' And you rush out, carefully closing the door behind you.
"And while you're turning down the stove, the phone rings, and then Jason comes in with a scrape on his elbow, and the visiting teacher supervisor calls for your report, and then its suppertime, and someone forgot to turn on the dishwasher so that you're eating off paper plates, and then you have to drive Lynne to her basketball game. So by the time you get back to the room where Jesus is still patiently waiting for you, you're so tired that you can barely keep your eyes open- let alone sit worshipfully at Jesus' feet to wait for those words of profound wisdom and spiritual power to wash over, to make you different, to make everything else different- and you fall asleep whispering, 'I'm sorry. I'll try to do better. I'm so sorry''' (Chieko N Okazaki Lighten Up)

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Motherhood- Not like I'd dreamed it would be

When I took a parenting class in college I thought I had everything figured out. I dreamed of an organized and love filled home. Now I'm in the thick of it and wonder if I can get through just one more tattle or someone crying from getting hit, and if I could actually be a Christlike parent.

Last night I cried before I fell asleep.
I lay there thinking about my mom watching me do a pretty lousy job with my four. Did she see how grumpy, selfish and impatient I was all day long? Was she disappointed?

After the house was quiet and I had time to think the guilt set in. Actually I felt it all day and it probably added to the problem.

I'm off balance again. Thinking too much about getting my house decorated, cleaned.

Sometimes, I'd like to put my family on auto pilot.- Doesn't work that way. I know how important it is for them to work, laugh, and accomplish things on their own, but it requires so much of my time. Time for teaching, playing with them, being consistent.

My sisters already know this- I'm selfish with my time.

Abby keeps wanting to help. She tells me she wants to do a job. Its faster to do it myself.
I've got so much to do sometimes. I feel like I don't have the time.

I want so much for my kids. Want them to grow up to be happy, self-sufficient, charitable adults.

This is so random. I have so much to learn. Its so humbling to be a parent.

I know what I have to do.

I was so mad at my kids yesterday. It was all their fault. NOT REALLY. It was me. My attitude stunk!!!

Its a funk I get in every once in awhile. I'm not the first, I'm sure. I know that have the battle is admitting it all.
Now I just have to do something about it.

I need to get on my knees more than I do.
Forget about painting my walls.
Laugh
Not be so stinkin' serious.
Quit nagging and finding problems with everything they do.
Look for the good.
Give kisses and hugs.
Dance.
Expect more responsibility.
Teach.
Discipline with love.

I think I need to get up early tomorrow.
Could you utter a little prayer for me?

♥